How do you Evaluate Surrender? -

Surrender is one of those words that sounds noble when we say it but feels like defeat when we live it. That’s because we often misunderstand what surrender actually means.

Most of us assume surrender is about giving up control and letting God take over—like handing Him the wheel while we climb into the backseat and take a nap. And when things work out in our favor, we think, Yep, I must have surrendered correctly! But when things don’t go as expected, we start asking, Did I really surrender? Or did I miss something?

The problem is that we often use outcomes to measure our level of surrender. If life is smooth, we think we’ve surrendered well. If life is chaotic, we assume we haven’t surrendered enough. But that’s not how surrender works.

True surrender isn’t about controlling the outcome—it’s about laying down the need for an outcome to validate our obedience. And surrender doesn’t stop at outcomes; it runs deeper. Here are five things surrender actually requires:

1. Surrendering Outcomes

This is the one we tend to think of first, and for good reason. If we say we’ve surrendered but are still emotionally tied to a certain result, have we really surrendered? Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane gave us the ultimate model of surrendered outcomes when He prayed, “Not my will, but Yours be done.” He had a preference (as any human would), but He released the final say to the Father.

Surrendering outcomes means taking action in obedience to God without demanding a specific result. It means trusting that the outcome—whether it looks like victory or loss—is in His hands, not ours.

2. Surrendering Experience

We often expect surrender to come with a certain feeling—peace, clarity, or even relief. But what if it doesn’t? What if surrender feels just as uncertain as before?

Many of us subconsciously expect surrender to bring emotional confirmation. If we feel good about our choice, we think we’ve surrendered well. If we feel anxious or doubtful, we assume we must have taken back control. But surrender isn’t about getting the right emotional experience. It’s about trusting that obedience is enough, even when we don’t feel it.

3. Surrendering Reputation

Let’s be honest—we like to look like we have our faith together. Surrendering to God is great, but we’d prefer if it made us look wise, confident, and spiritually strong. However, true surrender often means looking foolish to those who don’t understand.

Noah looked ridiculous building a boat in the desert. Moses looked irresponsible leading people into the wilderness without a plan. Mary looked like a liar when she claimed she was pregnant by the Holy Spirit. Surrender doesn’t always protect our reputation. Sometimes, it puts us in situations where only time will reveal the wisdom of obedience.

4. Surrendering Timing

God’s timing and our timing are rarely the same. We want to surrender and see results immediately—preferably with a clear and satisfying conclusion. But God often asks us to wait, to walk in obedience without a visible finish line in sight.

Surrender means trusting that delays are not denials, and that just because we don’t see movement doesn’t mean God isn’t working. It’s the willingness to keep taking steps without demanding a fast-forward button.

5. Surrendering the Need to Measure It

This one is the trickiest. We constantly want to check in on our surrender levels—Am I doing it right? Have I surrendered enough? But the moment we start measuring, we’ve already stepped out of surrender and into control.

Surrender isn’t a switch you flip. It’s a position of the heart. And the moment we try to assess our level of surrender based on how our life is going, we’re using the wrong metric. Outcomes, emotions, and experiences are not proof of surrender. Trust is.

Reflection Questions to Evaluate Surrender

1. What is my obedience based on?
   Am I following God because I trust Him, or because I expect a certain outcome in return?
   
   
2. How do I respond when things don’t go as planned?
   Do I feel betrayed or resentful when God’s plans don’t match my expectations?  Or do I remain steady in my trust, even when I don’t understand?
   
   
3. What am I afraid of losing?
   Is there something—my reputation, my timeline, my comfort—that I am still clinging to?  Am I willing to let that go if God asks me to? 

Then try this simple but powerful prayer:  Help me Dad - I trust you!  Help me Dad - I trust you!

Final Thoughts

Surrendering to God isn’t about making sure things go well for us. It’s about trusting that His will is better than ours, even when we can’t see how. When we say, "YES" - without needing a guarantee of comfort, success, or understanding, THAT is the most honoring thing we can give back to the God that needs noting from us. 

Jesus didn’t surrender His life so things would go His way—He surrendered it because He trusted the Father.  If that flavor of surrender was enough for Him, it’s enough for us too.